I feel like Voldemort truly is the ultimate socially awkward penguin.

Try to rule the world -> Thwarted by 1 yr old

Plan a dastardly scheme to return -> Spend one year attached to the back of a face

Use a gigantic poisonous snake as a weapon -> Defeated by a hat

Brag to Harry Potter about how great you are -> He feels sorry for you

Open locket which contains a piece of Voldemort’s soul -> Also contains porn

Finally kill Harry Potter -> Oh wait…

Finally acquire Elder Wand -> it actually belongs to a seventeen year old.

Become Lord Voldemort -> Harry calls you ‘Tom’.

Open Chamber of Secrets -> only kill Myrtle.

Take over the Ministry and all of England -> get defeated by schoolchildren. again.

(Source: fiyahwhisky, via hermiola)